Hope

We began the drive downtown laughing and discussing the Christmas season and then reality hit. We were stuck in traffic and worried about finding a parking spot and arriving at the concert on time. We watched a cop chase a car that almost hit him and another cop took the license plate number of a bus driver who didn't wait for pedestrians. My friend and I found ourselves confused, on edge, and anxious to get to our destination and then I heard a little girl yell Merry Christmas and saw a little boy dancing on the sidewalk and  suddenly the wait didn't seem to matter. A parking spot a block from the conference center became free as soon as we were passing and thus continued the night of Christmas miracles.

The Mormon Tabernacle Christmas concert featuring Alfie Boe and Tom Brokaw was absolutely amazing and I will not admit how many times tears came as we listened to the beautiful music and heard the spoken word. Alfie sang Bring Him Home(The Prayer) from Les Mis and wow is all I can say. I may have a little crush on Tom Brokaw's brain and brilliance and loved hearing him speak. He told a story of Gail Halvorsen, a pilot during WWII, who met young children and shared a couple of sticks of gum and then dropped his and others candy rations attached to handkerchief parachutes for the children in Berlin. Soon candy came from all over the world. Candy for the enemy. Hope for the enemy. Halversen was at the concert and spoke to Tom about his experience and I am fairly certain that many tears fell as he related his experience. It made me think of the shooting at an elementary school this past week and the thought that in the midst of the dark and often terrible  circumstances, we can seek and find hope.

On my way home, another Christmas miracle brought me hope and peace. I passed the cemetery near my home and saw luminaries faintly glowing and quickly turned off my radio, dimmed my lights and enjoyed the stillness of the night.

My Life in Pictures

It's been awhile. At least two months and I would say that I vow to do better with writing and documenting my life on this blog, but I must be honest and will instead say that I will think about the blog more and write as often as I can. Whoo. That feels better.

In order to catch up, I'll simply include pictures of some of the events during the past few months...

August- Co-chair weekend in Monterey...

Mumford and Sons

August- Annual BYU football game with Steve and Jamie Lyn.

 Eastern Idaho State Fair Labor Day tradition with the family and Meags. The Indian Relays is my favorite event.

  September- 1st Annual Dinner in White SLC.

October- Disneyland and Club 33 as a reward for running a half marathon the week before.

Pumpkin carving party with Nicole and Jamie Lyn. I carved the mummy-I impressed myself with my skills. 

October- Weekend in Chi-town for food, fun, and friends!

Skydeck Chicago 

I loved seeing this face(Tay) in Chicago...

 

Spending time with friends over Thanksgiving-Meagers and Pelos.

Andy Warhol exhibit at BYU with Hawk.

I Run...for Me

I started running in college. It was a great stress reliever and all I had to do(easier was put on my running shoes, leave my apartment, and start moving. It wasn't easy and yes, there were runs that were better than others but I kept going and it helped to have a couple of friends to run with.

Fast forward to 2012 and I found myself wanting to return to running and the next thing I knew, I had signed up for a half marathon. Yes, I paid money to run 13.1 miles. I found a training schedule and the running regimen began. The first couple of days I didn't run far or fast but I focused on the fact that I was running. During the weeks of training, I gradually found myself looking forward to the runs. It became a time to let go of worries, struggles, and concerns and focus on me. I learned to listen to my body and felt my body respond to the mental pep talks and my legs carried me mile after mile. I often ran in the early morning and watched the sun rise over the mountains and felt gratitude for life and my physical body. For the ability to move. To run. To feel pain and soreness. To make progress.

The day of the race came and I was surprisingly calm. I knew I had prepared and told myself it was just like any other long run(except for the fact that I now had hundreds of people running with me and there was a 6 hour time limit.) The race started and the first 7 miles went quickly and then the doubts came.

 "I could hide in a bush and call my parents to meet me somewhere."

                       "Ugh. My legs hurt and I can't keep going."

"I 'm sure I can walk the rest and still finish in under 6 hours..."

Each time a negative thought came, I forced it out and focused on something positive. Several friends sent me text messages and one sent a motivational video which definitely helped me as I ran miles 7-9. I focused on each step and did my best to enjoy the beautiful canyon and changing leaves as I pushed myself closer to the finish line. I thought of ancestors who once lived in that area and felt my pace quicken and my legs move with more determination. As I approached mile 12, I saw a couple of home owners turn on sprinkles and I smiled and thanked them for the kind gesture as I ran through the water and laughed while others also found a brief respite from the run.

Soon I heard people yelling and I saw the finish line and I looked around to find my parents and then I heard it- my dad's whistle. And the sound of the whistle and hearing my name as I crossed the finish line made it all worth it. Even more than that, I had set and accomplished a goal. A hard and difficult goal.

I ran for me...and won.

Let Me

Let me learn from where I have been

So keep my eyes to serve, my hands to learn

So keep my eyes to serve, my hands to learn

                                                                    ~Mumford and Sons

The news came that your life on earth came to an end and I sat in shock. I read the words again and again, trying to erase the truth and bring you back. I recalled memories of college and the laughter and joy that seemed to follow you everywhere. Through the years, we stayed in contact through our blogs, facebook, and parties and you always had the kindest words to say. I followed your career and was in awe of your achievements and accolades and on paper, one would think you had it all and that your life was problem and worry free and yet, we all know the truth that life is hard. Wouldn't it be something if we all walked around with a sign that told of our struggles, concerns, heartache, and worry? Would it make a difference? Would we step up and reach out to those around us? It's one thing to walk around with a cast on a broken arm and people ask what happened but what about matters of the heart- the area we don't often see as we interact with friends, family, and strangers. The truth is that we often mask our fears, pain, disappointments and we shouldn't have to wear those on our sleeves in order for people to smile, say a kind word, or simply act in a way that shows that we are loved. And then we have to somehow internalize those acts of kindness which isn't always easy.

Be gentle. Love. Forgive. Others. And yourself. 

Wait

I came across this quote on a blog this morning and have been thinking about since that time:

"It is not easy...to wait. Waiting is what the hunter does, and the poet and the slugger. He waits for the moment of inevitability and fate and then he swings, or shoots, or takes up the pen to put down a line. They don't teach us to wait in America; they teach us to grab. But waiting is what we do when we are looking for something beautiful, when we are looking for an end to our sorrow. Nothing is infinite in life, not even sorrow." 

Cary Tennis

Summer

summer, after all, is a time when wonderful things can happen to quiet people...summer just opens the door and lets you out.

I watched this video several times today and it simply makes me smile.

Warm Weather Fun

Summer is:

Bike rides with friends.

Red carpet events and my name in the credits before the film.

Playing the piano for the downtown SLC crowd. 

Arts Festival 2012

Tagging with Lohra

Real game with friends from work. 

Drive-in movie with friends I've known for years and years. 

There's No Place Like Home

I have spent quite a bit of time with my family during the past several weeks and it has been so great. Meags and I went to B town for my cousins wedding and then a couple of weeks later, I traveled home to visit with the entire fam. We spent time laughing, playing, and of course we went for root beer ice cream cones. 

Marshmallow gun fights and playing at the park.

Clay and his family came for a visit and Syden's one wish was that the family go to Craters of the Moon and how could we say no. My favorite moment was when we entered the first cave and the girls were crying and Clay turned to Tennille and asked why she was still wearing sunglasses and it was then that I realized I was also wearing mine. No wonder it was extra dark inside the cave.

This girl melts my heart and I love her mad yoga skills. 

 My mom has a collection of grandma and grandpa Bingham's glasses and we like to wear them whenever we get together. Tradition!

My sister-in-law insisted that we all go to the Potato Museum in B town so off we went. I found a dress I would like to make and wear at my next formal event. 

And I simply love this Western Union sent to housewives back in the day. 

Celebrate the Changes

Life doesn't always go as we think it should.

                                            Change happens. 

People move-whether physically, emotionally, or both.

                        Hearts ache and are broken.

Sometimes it feels as though the only consistent thing in life is change. It can be easy to sink into a hole of bitterness and long for the past and a time that we deemed to have been perfect. I believe that change can be a good thing- allowing a person to find strength and character and a renewed sense of self. Celebrating the changes is something I was reminded of while recently watching a film and this lesson could not have come at a better time. Change is hard and is not always welcome and there may be days that I want to hide but I choose to put on my brave face and meet the challenges with confidence. In the past month, I have bid farewell to friends moving to different states. I learned of a close friend unexpectedly losing their father. Another watched as her mother's battle with cancer came to an end. Lest this becomes a heavy post, it should be noted that some change is and has been positive. The birth of a child. Friends finding love and being married. New opportunities at work. Travel plans. With change all around, I choose happiness. I chose to take one day(or second) at a time and move forward, knowing that this life is mine and I can and will continue to do amazing things, even if I take a few detours from the path I think I want in order to find something even better.

The Civil Wars

I had thought about purchasing tickets to The Civil Wars concert and then forgot until after they won a Grammy and the concert was sold out. My friends and I searched the KSL classifieds for tickets and I was not feeling super hopeful as people were selling the tickets for double the face value.

Fast forward to the day before the concert and I decided to check the classifieds and was shocked to see two sets of tickets being sold at face value so a text was quickly sent to inquire about tickets. Meags and I received a response from a girl who happened to live in the area and soon we were on our way to pick up the tickets. At the same time, Kiera and Miguel were trying to contact us because they contacted the same two sellers and were also able to procure tickets to the concert.

We arrived at the concert and decided we needed food and Jimmy John's simply made sense. Besides, they are known for their freaky fast delivery and I should add that people in line cheered for us when our food arrived. If only everyone could be as smart as us. 

 Milo Greene opened for The Civil Wars and I have decided I must be in their band. We met them after the show so I'm on my way to carving a place into the group. 

Kiera, Miguel, Meags, and me.

The Civil Ward collection o' guitars

This is my second time seeing The Civil Wars and I vow to see them each time they come to a city near me. 

I'm on a Bike

May is National Bike Month which makes it the perfect time to finally purchase my own bike. You see, I have been looking at bikes and talking about bikes for the past four or five years but when it came time to actually pay for one, I would freak out and leave the shop. I guess(I know) big purchases are difficult for me so I did what I usually do in these kind of situations: I set a goal. On Monday I vowed to buy a bike by the end of the week and I accomplished my goal yesterday.

I walked into a local bike shop and 5, yes 5, guys stopped and stared at me but didn't say a word. I smiled and said hi and again, nothing. I wish I was exaggerating because it was an awkward moment. I browsed at a couple of bikes and hoped that someone would ask if I needed assistance and when that didn't happen, I quickly left with my head hung low. I then went to Fishers Cyclery and was greeted by Gabriel and I knew immediately that I could trust his opinion and buy a bike. We made an Idaho connection, discussed bike options, and then I simply asked him to make a decision for me and he laughed. I left thinking I would eventually return to make the purchase and then ended up returning an hour later with a friend who provided moral support as I checked my pulse and made a final decision on a bike. Once I had decided on a bike, it was easier to spend money on a helmet, lights, fenders, etc. We laughed with the employees, discussed plans for bike riding adventures, and I even scored a free water bottle-win! When I got home, I had a little co-chair instructional moment in learning how to take off the front tire and it was a little stressful at the time, but sure came in handy when I went on a ride this morning and had to do it alone. I think I'm going to love owning a bike.