Love

I walked by the bathroom and quickly ran to my room to grab my phone in order to take a picture of what I had seen. My dad was blow drying my mom's hair. I didn't take the picture because this was shocking or out of the ordinary for my parents but rather I wanted to capture and freeze the moment within a picture to be reviewed again and again. My mom recently had shoulder surgery and blow drying her hair is difficult and she continues to learn when to let go and ask for help and my dad continues to see a need and seeks to help.

As I drove to my home after witnessing this moment of love, my heart swelled and I bookmarked this moment in my head and my heart hopefully never to be forgotten. I believe love is not only demonstrated by the words we speak but also by our acts and our acceptance of such service.

This I Believe...

She walked towards the car with her head down. "Shae, he doesn't like me. He won't walk to the car with me after school." I swept her up into my arms and let her talk about her day. Her brother soon ran to the car and we traveled to grandma's house.

Fast forward a couple of months and this same little girl was leaving school when a classmate grabbed her backpack and coat and started to play keep away. She stood there, looking around and wondered what to do as her coat was eventually ripped in the struggle. Just when she had given up hope, a voice yelled at the classmate and soon the backpack and coat was returned to the little girl. The boy then went to the classmates older sibling and let them know what happened. The kids ran to grandma's van and then the boy said he had something to take care of and he ran back to the classmate and told her "What you did was not okay. If it happens again, I will go to your house and tell your mom how you've been treating my sister." The brother returned to the van and told his sister and grandma that he had taken care of the situation which left the sister smiling in gratitude.

Love. It may not often be expressed or felt by those closest to us and yet it's there and will come through when needed most. This I believe...

The Polar Bear and the Nativity

We have a tradition in my family. Wait. My siblings and I have a tradition in which we place random objects in my mom's nativity each Christmas and brace ourselves for the discovery of placed items. Well, I thought about items I could place in the nativity but then forgot about it until it was too late.

My sister Pip called today and asked if I was the one who placed the polar bear next to the animals in the nativity and I started to laugh and wished I had been that clever. We went through each sibling(didn't take long since there are only 3 of us) and decided it must have been our dad or one of Pip's kids. Meanwhile, my mom is blaming me and my sister and the following picture was sent via text because "the polar bear will haunt you until you come clean about what you did."

My sister called me a few minutes ago and the case of the polar bear has been solved. She picked up her kids from school and asked her oldest if he had placed something in the nativity and apparently grandma had already asked him because he said "Why does everyone think I am the one who did it?" And then laughter came from the backseat and my seven year old nieces cover was blown. That sneaky little girl. In her defense, she claims grandma gave her permission to place the polar bear in the nativity. Grandma says she was given permission to play with the bear and it was found in the Christmas tree (along with an eagle) before finding his home next to the cattle in the nativity. I'm already preparing for next Christmas.

Lesson on Giving Thanks

My sister in law is one talented and thoughtful person and I am blessed to call her family and friend. I received a thank you note and a couple of pictures from the girls and it made my day.

Day and after day I check the mail and I am greeted by bills, magazines, AARP applications(WHAT?!), and coupons and then once in awhile I find correspondence from those I love. I think I'll start writing more letters.

Hope

We began the drive downtown laughing and discussing the Christmas season and then reality hit. We were stuck in traffic and worried about finding a parking spot and arriving at the concert on time. We watched a cop chase a car that almost hit him and another cop took the license plate number of a bus driver who didn't wait for pedestrians. My friend and I found ourselves confused, on edge, and anxious to get to our destination and then I heard a little girl yell Merry Christmas and saw a little boy dancing on the sidewalk and  suddenly the wait didn't seem to matter. A parking spot a block from the conference center became free as soon as we were passing and thus continued the night of Christmas miracles.

The Mormon Tabernacle Christmas concert featuring Alfie Boe and Tom Brokaw was absolutely amazing and I will not admit how many times tears came as we listened to the beautiful music and heard the spoken word. Alfie sang Bring Him Home(The Prayer) from Les Mis and wow is all I can say. I may have a little crush on Tom Brokaw's brain and brilliance and loved hearing him speak. He told a story of Gail Halvorsen, a pilot during WWII, who met young children and shared a couple of sticks of gum and then dropped his and others candy rations attached to handkerchief parachutes for the children in Berlin. Soon candy came from all over the world. Candy for the enemy. Hope for the enemy. Halversen was at the concert and spoke to Tom about his experience and I am fairly certain that many tears fell as he related his experience. It made me think of the shooting at an elementary school this past week and the thought that in the midst of the dark and often terrible  circumstances, we can seek and find hope.

On my way home, another Christmas miracle brought me hope and peace. I passed the cemetery near my home and saw luminaries faintly glowing and quickly turned off my radio, dimmed my lights and enjoyed the stillness of the night.

My Life in Pictures

It's been awhile. At least two months and I would say that I vow to do better with writing and documenting my life on this blog, but I must be honest and will instead say that I will think about the blog more and write as often as I can. Whoo. That feels better.

In order to catch up, I'll simply include pictures of some of the events during the past few months...

August- Co-chair weekend in Monterey...

Mumford and Sons

August- Annual BYU football game with Steve and Jamie Lyn.

 Eastern Idaho State Fair Labor Day tradition with the family and Meags. The Indian Relays is my favorite event.

  September- 1st Annual Dinner in White SLC.

October- Disneyland and Club 33 as a reward for running a half marathon the week before.

Pumpkin carving party with Nicole and Jamie Lyn. I carved the mummy-I impressed myself with my skills. 

October- Weekend in Chi-town for food, fun, and friends!

Skydeck Chicago 

I loved seeing this face(Tay) in Chicago...

 

Spending time with friends over Thanksgiving-Meagers and Pelos.

Andy Warhol exhibit at BYU with Hawk.

I Run...for Me

I started running in college. It was a great stress reliever and all I had to do(easier was put on my running shoes, leave my apartment, and start moving. It wasn't easy and yes, there were runs that were better than others but I kept going and it helped to have a couple of friends to run with.

Fast forward to 2012 and I found myself wanting to return to running and the next thing I knew, I had signed up for a half marathon. Yes, I paid money to run 13.1 miles. I found a training schedule and the running regimen began. The first couple of days I didn't run far or fast but I focused on the fact that I was running. During the weeks of training, I gradually found myself looking forward to the runs. It became a time to let go of worries, struggles, and concerns and focus on me. I learned to listen to my body and felt my body respond to the mental pep talks and my legs carried me mile after mile. I often ran in the early morning and watched the sun rise over the mountains and felt gratitude for life and my physical body. For the ability to move. To run. To feel pain and soreness. To make progress.

The day of the race came and I was surprisingly calm. I knew I had prepared and told myself it was just like any other long run(except for the fact that I now had hundreds of people running with me and there was a 6 hour time limit.) The race started and the first 7 miles went quickly and then the doubts came.

 "I could hide in a bush and call my parents to meet me somewhere."

                       "Ugh. My legs hurt and I can't keep going."

"I 'm sure I can walk the rest and still finish in under 6 hours..."

Each time a negative thought came, I forced it out and focused on something positive. Several friends sent me text messages and one sent a motivational video which definitely helped me as I ran miles 7-9. I focused on each step and did my best to enjoy the beautiful canyon and changing leaves as I pushed myself closer to the finish line. I thought of ancestors who once lived in that area and felt my pace quicken and my legs move with more determination. As I approached mile 12, I saw a couple of home owners turn on sprinkles and I smiled and thanked them for the kind gesture as I ran through the water and laughed while others also found a brief respite from the run.

Soon I heard people yelling and I saw the finish line and I looked around to find my parents and then I heard it- my dad's whistle. And the sound of the whistle and hearing my name as I crossed the finish line made it all worth it. Even more than that, I had set and accomplished a goal. A hard and difficult goal.

I ran for me...and won.

Let Me

Let me learn from where I have been

So keep my eyes to serve, my hands to learn

So keep my eyes to serve, my hands to learn

                                                                    ~Mumford and Sons

The news came that your life on earth came to an end and I sat in shock. I read the words again and again, trying to erase the truth and bring you back. I recalled memories of college and the laughter and joy that seemed to follow you everywhere. Through the years, we stayed in contact through our blogs, facebook, and parties and you always had the kindest words to say. I followed your career and was in awe of your achievements and accolades and on paper, one would think you had it all and that your life was problem and worry free and yet, we all know the truth that life is hard. Wouldn't it be something if we all walked around with a sign that told of our struggles, concerns, heartache, and worry? Would it make a difference? Would we step up and reach out to those around us? It's one thing to walk around with a cast on a broken arm and people ask what happened but what about matters of the heart- the area we don't often see as we interact with friends, family, and strangers. The truth is that we often mask our fears, pain, disappointments and we shouldn't have to wear those on our sleeves in order for people to smile, say a kind word, or simply act in a way that shows that we are loved. And then we have to somehow internalize those acts of kindness which isn't always easy.

Be gentle. Love. Forgive. Others. And yourself. 

Wait

I came across this quote on a blog this morning and have been thinking about since that time:

"It is not easy...to wait. Waiting is what the hunter does, and the poet and the slugger. He waits for the moment of inevitability and fate and then he swings, or shoots, or takes up the pen to put down a line. They don't teach us to wait in America; they teach us to grab. But waiting is what we do when we are looking for something beautiful, when we are looking for an end to our sorrow. Nothing is infinite in life, not even sorrow." 

Cary Tennis

Summer

summer, after all, is a time when wonderful things can happen to quiet people...summer just opens the door and lets you out.

I watched this video several times today and it simply makes me smile.

Warm Weather Fun

Summer is:

Bike rides with friends.

Red carpet events and my name in the credits before the film.

Playing the piano for the downtown SLC crowd. 

Arts Festival 2012

Tagging with Lohra

Real game with friends from work. 

Drive-in movie with friends I've known for years and years. 

There's No Place Like Home

I have spent quite a bit of time with my family during the past several weeks and it has been so great. Meags and I went to B town for my cousins wedding and then a couple of weeks later, I traveled home to visit with the entire fam. We spent time laughing, playing, and of course we went for root beer ice cream cones. 

Marshmallow gun fights and playing at the park.

Clay and his family came for a visit and Syden's one wish was that the family go to Craters of the Moon and how could we say no. My favorite moment was when we entered the first cave and the girls were crying and Clay turned to Tennille and asked why she was still wearing sunglasses and it was then that I realized I was also wearing mine. No wonder it was extra dark inside the cave.

This girl melts my heart and I love her mad yoga skills. 

 My mom has a collection of grandma and grandpa Bingham's glasses and we like to wear them whenever we get together. Tradition!

My sister-in-law insisted that we all go to the Potato Museum in B town so off we went. I found a dress I would like to make and wear at my next formal event. 

And I simply love this Western Union sent to housewives back in the day. 

Celebrate the Changes

Life doesn't always go as we think it should.

                                            Change happens. 

People move-whether physically, emotionally, or both.

                        Hearts ache and are broken.

Sometimes it feels as though the only consistent thing in life is change. It can be easy to sink into a hole of bitterness and long for the past and a time that we deemed to have been perfect. I believe that change can be a good thing- allowing a person to find strength and character and a renewed sense of self. Celebrating the changes is something I was reminded of while recently watching a film and this lesson could not have come at a better time. Change is hard and is not always welcome and there may be days that I want to hide but I choose to put on my brave face and meet the challenges with confidence. In the past month, I have bid farewell to friends moving to different states. I learned of a close friend unexpectedly losing their father. Another watched as her mother's battle with cancer came to an end. Lest this becomes a heavy post, it should be noted that some change is and has been positive. The birth of a child. Friends finding love and being married. New opportunities at work. Travel plans. With change all around, I choose happiness. I chose to take one day(or second) at a time and move forward, knowing that this life is mine and I can and will continue to do amazing things, even if I take a few detours from the path I think I want in order to find something even better.

The Civil Wars

I had thought about purchasing tickets to The Civil Wars concert and then forgot until after they won a Grammy and the concert was sold out. My friends and I searched the KSL classifieds for tickets and I was not feeling super hopeful as people were selling the tickets for double the face value.

Fast forward to the day before the concert and I decided to check the classifieds and was shocked to see two sets of tickets being sold at face value so a text was quickly sent to inquire about tickets. Meags and I received a response from a girl who happened to live in the area and soon we were on our way to pick up the tickets. At the same time, Kiera and Miguel were trying to contact us because they contacted the same two sellers and were also able to procure tickets to the concert.

We arrived at the concert and decided we needed food and Jimmy John's simply made sense. Besides, they are known for their freaky fast delivery and I should add that people in line cheered for us when our food arrived. If only everyone could be as smart as us. 

 Milo Greene opened for The Civil Wars and I have decided I must be in their band. We met them after the show so I'm on my way to carving a place into the group. 

Kiera, Miguel, Meags, and me.

The Civil Ward collection o' guitars

This is my second time seeing The Civil Wars and I vow to see them each time they come to a city near me. 

I'm on a Bike

May is National Bike Month which makes it the perfect time to finally purchase my own bike. You see, I have been looking at bikes and talking about bikes for the past four or five years but when it came time to actually pay for one, I would freak out and leave the shop. I guess(I know) big purchases are difficult for me so I did what I usually do in these kind of situations: I set a goal. On Monday I vowed to buy a bike by the end of the week and I accomplished my goal yesterday.

I walked into a local bike shop and 5, yes 5, guys stopped and stared at me but didn't say a word. I smiled and said hi and again, nothing. I wish I was exaggerating because it was an awkward moment. I browsed at a couple of bikes and hoped that someone would ask if I needed assistance and when that didn't happen, I quickly left with my head hung low. I then went to Fishers Cyclery and was greeted by Gabriel and I knew immediately that I could trust his opinion and buy a bike. We made an Idaho connection, discussed bike options, and then I simply asked him to make a decision for me and he laughed. I left thinking I would eventually return to make the purchase and then ended up returning an hour later with a friend who provided moral support as I checked my pulse and made a final decision on a bike. Once I had decided on a bike, it was easier to spend money on a helmet, lights, fenders, etc. We laughed with the employees, discussed plans for bike riding adventures, and I even scored a free water bottle-win! When I got home, I had a little co-chair instructional moment in learning how to take off the front tire and it was a little stressful at the time, but sure came in handy when I went on a ride this morning and had to do it alone. I think I'm going to love owning a bike.

Life

A good reminder...

"You won't do it at the right time. You'll be late. You'll be early. You'll get re-routed. You'll get delayed. You'll change your mind. You'll change your heart. It's not going to turn out the way you thought it would. It will be better. ~Kate Moller

Summer is Coming

Ah, summer. The days of flip flops, pool parties, snow cones, and outdoor concerts. 

Bully

Bully, directed by Lee Hirsch, is a documentary which shows the impact bullying has on several students and their families. The movie is powerful and should be viewed by all students, educators, and parents or basically, everyone. I felt so many emotions while watching the film and it is consuming my thoughts and conversation.

 After the film, Doug Fabrizio hosted a Q&A with the director where we learned more about the students and their families. I appreciated the director talking about the film initially receiving an R rating for language while another movie about children who battle until there is only one left was given a PG-13 rating. One person in the audience asked why people bully and I loved Lee's response as he explained that he is a filmmaker and not a social worker and his purpose is to show that one person can make a difference and we need to be talking about this issue and figuring what we do to change things so that children are safe on the bus and in school. I think that often the school counselors and administrators can be overwhelmed with all of their duties, and yet I feel there is so much that should and must be done. Any excuse such as "boys will be boys and that's how kids are," is not okay and it's time we each took a more vested interest in what's going on. I think it's also important to note that it's not always fellow students who bully. I know a couple of kids who are being bullied by teachers and my heart breaks to hear the kids say they hate school and are counting down the days until they no longer have to see the person making school difficult.

Go see this film and then instead of only talking about what can be done to make things better, let's take action and be part of the change. One person can make a difference.

Book Giver

World Book Night started in 2011 in the UK and is now being celebrated in the United States. It is an event to encourage reading with the giving away of free paperback books. I applied to be a giver several months ago and had a great experience talking to people about Kite Runner. After reading several accounts of book giving, I was a little worried about being rejected but that did not happen. Maybe I simply chose wisely, but everyone I talked to was excited to receive a new book. One girl told me she has an unread copy of the book but is planning to start reading after our discussion. I also gave several copies of the book to local organizations that are in need of book donations.

My Kind of Therapy

 Bruce and Jamie invited me to California this past week and it was just what I needed. Sun. Friends. Laughter. And more sun. Nicole picked me up from the airport and we went straight to the grocery store for supplies for the week which ended with us leaving meat at the counter and purchasing one of every cookie flavor available. I loved eating breakfast with the doors open and listening to the waterfall and then spending time outside while everyone got ready for the day. At night we spent time in the hot tub, enjoyed the fire pit, and watched tv through the open doors to the house.

 We traveled to Sea World one day and the weather was perfect and the fellow Sea World goers provided a lot of joy. I felt slightly overdressed and wish I had been warned that I attended "wear your tightest workout clothing" day. Oh well, next time. I feel that I should admit that I also provided some entertainment for the attendees at Sea World as captured in the picture below. In my defense, sometimes music calls to me and I must dance.

We fed sea lions and it was hilarious and a little scary to see the animals fight for the fish. The birds in SD are crazy and I never knew if they were part of a show or just there to annoy us and attempt to land on my head. I guess birds like my hair. Some people bring extra money to a place like Sea World for souvenirs, but we brought extra money to try the various foods. I won't go into detail about all the foods we ate, but we did rate each item on a scale of 1-10 so I now feel qualified to help others in planning a trip to Sea World.  

And what is a trip to California without time spent at the beach? Aunt Cole and Brayden had a great time building a sand castle. As we were setting up chairs and putting towels on the beach, we heard a loud sound and realized a bird went to the bathroom on one of the towels which is just our luck. I should have known the day would be interesting after I dropped my ice cream cone on my shirt as it fell to the ground.